SUCCESS VS HAPPINESS

I am 23. Living in a so-called civilized society , people expect me to have answers to questions like ' what am I going to do in my life?', ' Where would I be 20 years from now in my career?', 'How much would have I saved by then?' , ' when am I going to book an apartment?'( The question is not whether I require an apartment of my own. It is just WHEN.) If I have answers to these questions by now and execute it as planned, I would be considered as someone who has achieved his ultimate goal of life.

  Even if I have achieved it, the irony is that I would have been  just an audience in setting MY OWN GOAL( Isn't it like me not attending my own marriage). So rather than answering the above lesser valued questions, the appropriate question to be answered would be 'WHAT IS THE ULTIMATE PURPOSE OF LIFE?'.  Answering this question might help us to be an active participant rather than being just an audience in setting our own goal.

 The answer that strikes me instantly is ' THE ULTIMATE PURPOSE OF LIFE IS TO BE SUCCESSFUL'. Though this answer sounds a bit generic, I like this answer because it projects me as an ambitious and determined man.( Yes, I am a man now. I no more have the luxury of being a boy.)
But it is much easier to project you as a strong-willed person than to actually be one.

So when I ponder over the question for few more minutes, my answer transforms to ' THE ULTIMATE PURPOSE OF LIFE IS TO BE HAPPY'. This sounds a matured answer. But in the name of becoming mature, people actually become less-ambitious and docile(May be this is the reason why with aging comes complacency.) There can be two answers to a question. But surely one must be better than the other(This is how we have been taught in our schools.) Let me start evaluating the two answers.

Is there a difference between success and happiness(or are they synonymous).I have seen successful people exuberantly rambling about how happy they are in life. So it does look like happiness is a by-product of success.In my very little experience I had with life, I was not all that happy when I was 'what people called success'. Everyone has their own definition of success. What if, my definition of success is 'TO BE HAPPY'( I know I am starting to get ambiguous).

Now that we have evaluated(and given lesser marks)success, let me start with happiness.To me, Happiness is highly deceptive that we can not trust it. What might seem happiness today,might not be the same few years down the line.Few years back, playing cricket was happiness to me.Today, better job with better salary is coveted happiness to me.This might change tomorrow.

So my conclusion(after two useless hours of thinking) is that' THE ULTIMATE PURPOSE OF LIFE IS LIVING'.This might sound too simple a answer to a possibly complex spiritual question.Not always there needs to be a complex answer for a complex quesion.As our innate quality, we tend to ignore simpler things which might well be the solution for bigger problems.

      THE ULTIMATE PURPOSE OF LIFE IS LIVING

PS: If on a friday  afternoon, you are all alone and you dont feel sleepy , this is how insane you could get.

IMPERFECT ENDING

He met her. He acquainted her. He befriended her. And finally he loved her.( Actually, he conceived he loved her). But he didnt know whether she felt the same about him. And he would never know that in the future too.

The moment he saw her for the first time in their class( that was the only moment he saw her. From then on, he totally ogled her). He felt she was the hottest girl in the class, may be in the entire college, may be in the entire world. Because he had never seen a prettier girl than her. Though he didnt believe in love-at -first-sight, he totally believed in lust-at-first-sight.

After a few days he got a chance to speak to her. Whenever he spoke to her he tried to act calm and casual. But inside he was restless and agitated. He felt like all his organs were folk dancing.He has ogled and flirted with infinite number of chicks(sorry, girls), but this feeling was new to him. He wondered may be "this is what people call as LOVE". But as per People's definition of love, it is related to something called heart. So he was convinced and relaxed that this was not love.

As days became weeks, he was truly calm and casual when he spoke to her.He stopped ogling her and started to see her face. Now she looked elegant and beautiful. There seemed to be a bond growing between them gradually but steadily. He liked the way she spoke. He liked the way she carried herself. He admired her.

As weeks became months, their bond had grown vehemently stronger. He loved her brilliance more than her face. Yet at times she was innocent as a child. He couldnt understand how could she be both brilliant and innocent at the same time. When his friends asked what was the relationship between them, he really didnt have an answer.

His feelings towards her kept on changing. For a week, he would think she was the best friend he has got. The next week, he wished he had a sister like her. The next week,  he felt like kissing her.He hated himself for having such feelings for her. The mistake was not only with him. The way she spoke to him was also a cause for his roller-coaster feelings.

None of their feelings were shared between them. Though they were the bravest among their peers, wording one's feelings needs a different kind of bravery which they lacked. He knew, the inevitable day would come, when they had to move apart and lead their own life. From that day ,their bond would weaken.She would not be near him to laugh at his silly jokes. They could not watch a movie together. He could not console her for her little failures. He could not lie to her that he liked her art works.He could not do a 1000 more silly but memorable things. And he could not love her.

Yes, that was love.He had heard LOVE HURTS.Just the thought of the inevitable day caused him excruciating pain. If this was not love, what else could be.

But WHAT IF she rejects him.WHAT IF she says " you are nothing more than a friend to me". WHAT IF she says " you are a cheap guy". WHAT IF she says " you are just another guy to me".( Life would be blissful if there were no WHAT IFS)He was afraid of the failure and decided to bury his love. He met the inevitable day not as a guy who loved her but as a friend who supported her.Time heals even the worst of wounds.

PS: This may not be the perfect ending to the story( for many of you, this may not even be a story worth posting), but this is how many of the real life stories end.